Monday, September 24, 2012

The LL Cool J Conspiracy

This is a sketch, folks.  An illustration of gullibility: my own.

[Wow.  That was fucking intense.  I really went to a dark place there for a moment.  I'm sorry about that folks.  I am still working out the kinks.  That's where this meta-narrative comes in handy.  Yes, that's right, I have just turned this blog into a defense of meta-narratives... no...]

...a ululating orb of self pity, shrill as the noights air, suffering forth upon yonder rock ledges, yonder past yon trees...

[No, no.  Not popular fiction...  This was more social outrage in nature.  Anti-pop-culturish.]

I saw an ad for NCIS: Los Angles and got on Amazon and bought the mp3 album of Mama Said Knock You Out.  Then that inspired me to download Straight Outta' Compton, the 2002 REMIX. 

Thank God it wasn't anything by Marky Mark and the Funkybunch.  At least I bought good shit.  But anyways, I would do Calvin Klein ads if I was Mark Wahlberg too.  I heard a conspiracy theory once that Mark Wahlberg has a third nipple.  I would just like to say, unequivocally, I sincerely hope he does.   [No wait, that's not what I was trying to say at all.  Sorry, I am extremely easily distract-able tonight.]  Or maybe that was the point.  At least I didn't buy pure crap.  Next time I might not be so lucky.  Unless it is someone like Taylor Swift.  Then I'll at least have something to masturbate along to!

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