From the Depths of the Unknown

Emerges an Indie Writer & Book Publisher

It's All Back On with It's All Over Now

It's hard to believe that it has been nearly two whole years since the last time I wrote anything on this blog.

A lot has happened in my life and in the world since the last time I did in November 2020 but one thing that has not happened is me publishing anything. In fact, it has now been over four years since the last time that I committed anything to print. I suppose that's why my last few blog posts (when I was still doing them) had more to do with what was happening in the world at the time. Or whatever random bullshit that spewed out of my mind and found a home on this site. Let's be honest that there has been a fair amount of that over years as well. I am not ashamed of it. In fact, the sheer amount of random bullshit is kind of a point of pride for me.

Lately, I will be honest, my efforts to keep up with these things have been pretty minimal. I even considered (for a very short time) taking an indefinite break from writing. Thankfully, that thought did not stay in my mind for very long. At least not while I have ideas, and I always have ideas. At least, I have so far. This is just the pace that works for me, I suppose. Rest assured, I am living my life thoroughly between in the silences.

I do hope to do more writing on this blog again, but we'll see what happens. I need to knock some cobwebs off -- even though I do plenty of writing for work. That is just not the same thing, though. Sometimes, I still work on short stories, poems, and songs -- everything just takes longer nowadays. I need to do this type of writing occasionally for my soul (if that's a thing), and blogging usually scratches that itch in just the right way if the others things don't or I need to feel inspired, because for some reason blogging about them usually inspires me to work on those other things more.

Also, because I do slowly-but-surely work on the above-mentioned things, I do sometimes have something new to announce -- even if it might seem like it has been a while since the last update. Maybe it has been a while. Okay, it has. Today I actually break my unintional period of silence to write about a couple of developments, publishing-wise.

First, I am still working on my short fiction collection, Xennial. Basically, there are ten stories, and one needs to be finished, then all five of the new ones need to be thoroughly edited and rewritten, then everything needs to be copyedited and proofread. To be honest, a big part of the delay is that these stories aren't particularly timely and I have been working on this collection for what seems like forever so I am kind of burnt out on it. It is pretty much just some 30-something navel-gazing about a time in his life in his twenties that has long since passed. I am definitely going to finish it and publish it, but I am not setting a firm date on it until I am more done with it. It will probably be 2023 or later before it finally goes out. So that will make it a 40-something navel-gazing about a time in his life in his twenties that has been even longer since it passed. That's fine. I have already been working on it for like 12 years, what is another 1-2?

Second, I am focused on publishing a different, albeit much shorter, four-story short fiction collection called It's All Over Now. A bit fatalistic, I know, but it's fitting. See the Gott Press Home Page for a bit longer of a description of it. I am pretty excited to release this collection, which I hope to do in time for the 2022 holiday shopping season. It will definitely take some work on my part. I have to really thoroughly edit and rewrite a couple of these, and then copyedit and proofread all of them, but it's much more doable by the end of 2022 than the other collection. Plus, these stories are a bit more timely. I also have to do all of the cover art and design work for it, but that's not too bad. That part of it is actually pretty fun. I just have to figure out how I want to go about it this time. That is harder, but I do have a few ideas already.

That's okay. I have time to figure that out, because I need to focus on actually finishing it first before I can really safely start that. I actually have a deadline to finish it though (more to come on this soon), so that motivates me to think about it and work on it, and gives me a justifiable reason to complete it other than I just enjoy doing it.

You wouldn't think that it makes a difference but sometimes it just does. Let's see how it goes. Hopefully, more to come soon.

Everything You've Always Wanted to Know about Me

And More...

Given the generally positive reactions to my recent dipping of my toe into writing science fiction, my flash fiction chapbook, Dispatches from the Information Age, it's probably not a surprise to anyone that I also want to continue writing more in this vein, and indeed, that's why, until recently, I have gotten away from the more "realism" style in which I also write.

However, since deciding to split my short story collection, Xennial, into two collections, Xennial, and Asshole Years, I've come to the conclusion that both sides of my writing personality can coexist, just maybe not in the same collection--at least not this time. Since Asshole Years is what I'm focusing on first since it's much further along, for now, you'll probably hear me talk it about it and the stories it contains more than you'll hear me talk about what now comprises Xennial, but that's not too say that Xennial is on the back-burner, necessarily, I just won't be working on it as much. Once I get Asshole Years to the editing stage, it will be easier to work on both projects simultaneously.

I like to think my writing now is some cross between realism, dark humor, modernism and science fiction/satire that comes out as a kind of science-fiction-leaning Flannery O'Connor. This is more evident in Xennial, and in Asshole Years, it doesn't all come out at once, and certainly the collection as a whole strays mostly in the territory of realism and modernism, there is still a glimmer of the dark humor and science fiction that I also like. A very brief glimmer, but still a glimmer. That being said, Asshole Years is definitely firmly entrenched in a universe very closely based and very similar to our own.

These stories aren't true stories in that they actually happened, but they are stories about my life through fictional events that in some ways mirror my actual experiences. Call it truthiness. It's not an autobiography but the characters are truthful. That's what makes it fiction.

One idea I have toyed around with for Asshole Years to keep the ball rolling towards a 2019 publication and to get back to Xennial is to set a number of pages, say 200, and stick to it, no matter what. My plan is to smoothly and as naturally as possible get as close to whatever goal I set and then to fill the remaining pages with splashes of visual art. That would make it easier for me to do the design at the same time. Hell, I will likely finish it before I ever finish the three new stories, which is what mostly stands in my way of completing this thing. If I cut it close on the writing and editing to whatever deadline I set, the design will be done, or nearly done, and I can mainly just focus on finishing up.

Needless to say, while I am excited about Asshole Years, I am even more excited to get back to Xennial, which I aim to publish in 2020 on or about as close to election day as possible. Since it is more in the style that I aspire to write, I am going to just pull out all of the stops and get Asshole Years done so I can get back to it. I have spent the past eight years or so on most of these stories so it's about god damn time I get them in print the way that I want them to exist for forever--or, at least, that's what I tell myself will happen in order to be able to let them go.

Given then, that spirit of making progress, I have decided upon a cover, which I am happy to share here. Thank you to those on my Instagram stories who voted between the three cover designs. It was a hard choice but ultimately, I thought the design below was the best one to represent this set of stories.

 

Hopefully my desire to stay busy on this project will also mean good things for those who read this blog since I like to come here to think out loud and hone my ideas. I can't say at this point whether reality will truly reflect this desire, but I am hopeful...

So until next time, fare thee well, my friends!

Vacationing in the Snowpacalpse

Or, Midnight Confessions: Where did our life go... Right?

By Source, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=6940995

Vacation by the Go-Go's has become the unofficial anthem this weekend around casa de Gott.

We have at least a foot of snow and more is starting to come down, but the cold didn't seem too bad to me when I went outside to shovel. Then again, there is a difference between a city cold and a country cold, and Akron is definitely somewhere in between.

Sarah and I originally took Monday and Tuesday off to go on a long weekend trip, but because of the weather, of course, that didn't pan out. To be honest, we're making the best of it, and I am kinda glad it turned out this way. It has given me time to reflect, a little. Here we are, in our little bubble, living life, struggling at times, feeling successful at times, but getting through it and feeling stronger together. It is much nicer to have someone to hold hands with through the roller-coaster.

After the Go-Go's, The Grass Roots seems the next place to go as I choose the soundtrack to our hibernation. It popped up the other night when we had friends over and I was picking out just random records that I hadn't listened to in a while, and everyone seemed to enjoy it a lot, and I am especially super-jazzed about rediscovering it because it has on it one of my hands down all-time favorite songs, "Midnight Confessions."

Speaking of The Grass Roots, this seems like an excellent opportunity to sneak in a Creed Bratton meme:

via GIPHY

Other than this blog post, I have also committed time this weekend towards working on my short story collection(s) and what might be the beginning of a new music project.

The short story collection(s) I'm referring to is(are) what used to be called Xennial. I've got this crazy idea to split them because it wasn't really working for me to have the stories I'm writing now paired with stories I wrote ten years ago. Or even 8 years ago. The stories I'm writing now are different. I've grown, I think, as a writer, or at least developed my style, or, rather, a style that works for me. So those new 18 stories are what is currently titled Xennial. Most of these need a lot of work to finish so I realistically think it will be 2020 before it comes out, but that's okay, it will be a good book to publish on a major election year.

Don't worry though, I haven't given up hope about publishing something in 2019. The other 15 stories that were originally going to be included in Xennial with those 18 will be paired down to the best nine, and will be published, probably next, under the new title Asshole Years. These are all of my realistic fiction stories, most of which I wrote for different fiction classes at Kent State University. Here's what it will contain:

1. Eargasm (based on a blog post)
2. Dropout (new story based off of my old story, "The Other Side of Cool," originally published in Tales from the Fringes)
3. Truck Shop (published in Literally, Literary on Medium)
4. The Day the Music Died (published on Smashwords as a single)
5. Greasy (updated, originally published in Tales from the Fringes)
6. The Opossums (updated, originally published in Tales from the Fringes)
7. Highly Evolved (new)
8. A Hipster Confession (updated, originally published in Tales from the Fringes)
9. The Joint (new)

I don't have any cover art but that will be forthcoming, probably after I finish this blog post. The three new stories need finished but they are all pretty far along so this one I feel confident that I will be able to publish this year. It will probably be around 200 pages.

The music project will be under my Survival Pilot moniker, and will be at least one song, but I have at least two drum parts so there might be more. I don't know if I will finish it over this long weekend, but that is my goal. I am thinking about doing a free Soundcloud EP for record store day, or something, just for shits and giggles.

As you can see, I am never bored. Hopefully, you all are staying safe, warm, and entertained like we are here in Highland Square. And if you haven't heard "Midnight Confessions" in a while. Maybe you should give it a listen. You won't regret it.

Major Announcement, Complete with Fanfare

Hola mis amigos y amigas! Que tal? Es Sabado y estoy escribiendo un "blog post" para ustedes!

For those of you who don't speak Spanish: Hi friends! What's up? It's Saturday, and I'm writing a blog post for you!

And that's all for today's Espanol para Gringos, 101, brought to you by Sabado Gigante (RIP) and Medalla Light.

I'm in a good mood this morning for a few reasons. For one, I didn't have any obligations so I was able to sleep in past 9. Not to mention, it's shaping up to be a beautiful day weather-wise. However, the main reason I am just bubbling over with enthusiasm before noon on a Saturday is that I am ready to reveal the cover of my Akron Soul Train chapbook.

Drumroll, please. Spotlight ready... Curtains! Fanfare!

(front cover)

(back cover)

There you go. Hopefully not too underwhelming, or overwhelming. Hopefully just the right amount of whelming.

Yes, Idiot Parade is the title, and I want to ensure the PC Police that I don't mean that in a negative way. It's in reference to a line of one of the poems contained inside, "Expectations."

It will be approximately 50-60 pages of all free-verse and blackout poetry. My original intention was to also include flash fiction in it, but I instead plan on releasing another chapbook/short collection this summer that is exclusively fiction.

Anyways, this is also the first official publication of Gott Press, my own imprint. It seemed time to create more of a separation between myself and Createspace, and this was a great opportunity to do so with some of the stipend I received for being an Akron Soul Train Fellow. It is important to me to have complete creative and artistic independence so I can say what I want to say in the manner I want to say it, and this will ensure that I will continue to be able to do so. I have wanted to do this for a while, and I am excited about the future and the many books I plan on releasing on this label. More to come on this!

If you have been following my journey as an Akron Soul Train Fellow, you probably recognize the cover as a picture of the art that was created during my Happening at my Fellowship Kickoff party. I really liked how it turned out and it seemed like an appropriate use of this piece. The back cover, you might be able to tell, is the same picture, cropped slightly differently, and heavily edited with the photo editing software of my Samsung Galaxy S9.

Idiot Parade will be released on May 12 with a party here in Akron (more info TBA soon). I will be reading from it, as well as a few from my first poetry collection, Live Organ Transplants, and maybe some of my flash fiction, as well. There will also be live music and booze, and copies for sale. Stay tuned for more information!

I have one more official week left of my Fellowship. It has gone fast and I have thoroughly enjoyed every moment of it. That being said, I have plenty of work to do before May 12th, so that is only the official end. Really, it's a beginning, too. All my hard work and struggling the past 15 or so years is really starting to pay off, and I am excited about what the future holds.

Now it's time to go out and enjoy this beautiful sunshine. It's a good day for a drive through the country, and I am feeling especially inspired to create more art. Hopefully, you take advantage of this gorgeous day, too!

Take It Away, Freebird

What It Means to Be An Artist in the Age of Hyper-Capitalism

Photo by https://pixabay.com/en/crow-raven-bird-sky-silhouette-434754/.

As is prone to happen, lately I have spent many hours lying awake at night, my mind racing through all subjects.

I try telling myself that I won't be solving all of my issues and all of the world's problems at 4 a.m., especially when I have to get up in two hours to get ready for work, but my brain is not always very reasonable, so I put on music and hopefully that works. I try relaxation techniques, and maybe that does have an effect, but it takes a lot of concentration, and I can't always settle my brain down for very long. Some nights, I hardly get any sleep.

One issue that my brain has been tossing around especially a lot lately has been my pursuit of publishing and selling books, and in particular how I feel like I have pushed myself towards emulating the multitude of hucksters that you see out there, particularly on Twitter, that push their wares on unsuspecting and mostly uninterested multitudes, all in an effort to sell books.

Do this, and this, and this, the marketing gurus command from their digital pedestals, and you will make some money. This is how so-and-so author makes a living off of his/her publishing, they claim, and so can you.

As readers of this blog have witnessed, I have tried on several different pieces of this advice from these online "experts," but like trying on pants at a thrift store, most of them did not fit for one reason or another.

While I have learned a great deal, and certainly what not to do and what doesn't work for me, I have not yet figured out what actually does work for me specifically. When I write, I like to push boundaries. I enjoy expressing my thoughts and feelings in ways that are uniquely me, and I don't want to compromise.

Maybe it is just irrational stubbornness on my part, and maybe I will never be successful due to it, but, yadda yadda I consider myself an artist, and as an artist, I have decided that I need to do what is best for my art, and that means trashing most of the marketing bullshit and committing myself to doing it entirely my own way, for better or worse (of my bank account).

While I don't plan on getting rid of my social media or this blog, I have considered it. I have even been so disenchanted with writing lately that I have even considered giving up on it entirely. For those of you who know me, or who have read this blog for a while and feel like you know me, then you know that is a pretty big deal, but rather than taking a flying leap off of the precipice, I am seeking my own path, and at the very least returning to writing fiction solely for my enjoyment of it. 

I have a job, I have a cool writing gig, and those things are what I need to be focusing on right now. I am happy to share my writing with whoever wants to read it, but I am not going to go out of my way, or do anything that I feel compromises my integrity, as an artist, in order to sell books.

That cheapens it and takes the fun out of it for me, and I would rather enjoy it for the sake of doing it rather than trying to cater to someone else's ideas of how it should be done.

For those of you reading this who think I am making a mistake or whatever, you can just buzz off. It's people like you who are the reason why it is necessary for me to take this step.

Besides, on the grand scope of things, it doesn't really matter. There are more important things happening in this world and in my life right now. Self-publishing doesn't have to be done a certain way just because some people have done it that way and have sold a bunch of books because of it.

In fact, just because someone else has had success with a particular approach, it doesn't mean that way will work for everyone, and if you look at the number of books that most self-publishers actually sell while trying to do it that one way, then maybe you will see that what works for the people who are selling books isn't the best way for everyone. Not everyone has the same idea of success (queue "Freebird").

That's why I have to decided to make my eBooks free, or at least leave all of the ones that I currently have free, still free, and then some, possibly.

Of course, I will still have to charge for the print books if you want to buy them online or through a store, but I will also always give away as many as I can afford to buy at a time (to people I see in person). I feel like I would rather have people read read it and give it a chance than have unrealistic expectations about who will buy it or not.

It might seem a little silly to some, but that doesn't make it silly. Especially if my goal is to gain readers.

I can't guarantee I will always give all of my books away in this manner, but at least these ones. Probably also the updated version of my short story collection, and my flash fiction chapbook. They are short and sweet.

I don't know if people will want them, but it will be one less thing to worry about and one hour closer to a full night's sleep.

Tales from the Fringes (Remastered): Coming Soon to an Online Book Retailer Near You

If you have been following this for long enough, at least a few months at any rate, you will know that in addition to my next novel and a few other ongoing projects, I have been working on a new (and final) edition of my first book, my short story collection, Tales from the Fringes, which I originally published in May 2013 while I was a grad student at the University of Akron. The book originally came about as an experiment in self-publishing.

Since then, through three editions of my first novel, Escapes/Out in the Garage, I learned a lot about publishing. I also finished grad school and gained some experience teaching college-level English, and now I have a steady, full-time job, and a little more free time.

Originally, I only intended to mainly focus on the formatting, and also fix a few typos and grammatical mistakes, but as I began working on it, I realized that I had also come a long ways as a writer and an editor, and these stories were good enough for me to put a little more time and energy into getting right.

Now I am to the final editing and proofreading stage, and I am waiting for the proof to come in the mail, which should hopefully arrive on Monday.

In case you were wondering, here is the new cover and description:

Description

In Tales from the Fringes (Remastered), readers get glimpses of people’s lives from where nothing comes easy and happy endings are relative.

In “Greasy,” the Eggman, when he is not working at McDonalds, he is partying, sleeping around, and playing in a band, to no end. In “The Backwoods Incident,” four teenagers run afoul of Master Bael, a demon dog at the head of a cult of dagger-wielding humanoid opossums. At least that’s what the narrator, “The Marlboro Man,” thinks happens. In “The Banamen Prophecy,” a senile fashion designer, Howard Von O’Steinsonmanskinelli, brings about the end of the world by fulfilling an ancient Mayan prophecy.

This collection of twelve stories started as a fiction blog, the domain of which is the author’s homepage (www.gabegott.com). In this “Remastered” edition, each story has undergone some careful fine-tuning, producing what is sure to be the defining version of this set.

As you might be able to tell even from that little blurb, there are differences. However, the things that I liked and that other people seemed to like about the first one are in tact, and I really only changed the things that needed changing. A few of the key differences between the original and the "Remastered" versions include:

• Fewer stories: a few of the stories were redundant and/or not as good
• More professional formatting: this is the stuff I originally set out to change
• A slightly different order: I wanted there to be a certain flow through the stories
• Better writing: the more that I read, the more that I write, the more that I work towards it, the better my writing gets, and hopefully that is evident here

Once I get the manuscript to a point where I am satisfied and can read through it without changing anything, I will format the eBook version. Finally, once I am satisfied everything is to my liking, I will release it.

I don't have an exact date in mind yet, but when I do, you will be the first to know.

Out in the Garage now for sale as eBook

The second (and final) edition of Out in the Garage is now for sale at Smashwords, and pending review, will be for sale shortly at Amazon, where it is now also for sale in print. The recommended price is $1.99 for the eBook edition is $1.99, and $6.99 for the print edition--although Amazon currently has it listen for $6.29.

Happy Independent's Day!

It's Independence Day, but it is also, for all intents and purposes, Independent's Day, as well--since I am indeed an indie author!

The second (and final) edition of my first novel, Out in the Garage, is now out for sale on Create Space! Right now it is in paperback only, but, in the next day or two, it will appear in both print and digital formats in other online markets. Perhaps I will eventually get it distributed to some indie bookstores locally, as well.

This, as I have said, is the final edition of my first novel. How it has turned out is how it is going to be from now to the end of time. I am happy and excited, and I believe it is at its best ever, and I hope people will give it a chance, since the changes are a direct result of feedback that I have received from people I trust. It has come a long way in the past ten years, and I am glad to be moving on to the next project, which is really already under way--it is now, officially, though.

To make sure I don't change my mind and try to go back or whatever, I am moving straight into the next one, diving in head first. It is a much different book, in both the story itself and in the way I am coming at it. The first one I just started writing without any plan, and this one I have planned very carefully. We'll see how this helps. My goal to to be publishing it this time next year, which I believe is entirely reasonable. I have learned a lot and I am going to hopefully demonstrate it with this project.

I am not going to specifically state which project I have decided to pick up and get under way. As you know, I have a huge backlog of ideas from which to choose--although, some are further along than others. It will be kind of a surprise  to everyone when I announce which one, which will be much closer to the time that it is finished. For now, I will simply refer to it as novel #2.

Revelations

In an effort to achieve a higher level of professionalism, for the second edition of Out in the Garage, my wife, the lovely and talented artist, Sarah, used her graphic design skills and helped me create a new cover:

As you can see, it looks amazing, and I couldn't have done it without her hard work and talent, and I feel truly lucky to be married to such a talented individual.  This is going to be the final, definitive version of this book, and I am pulling out all of the stops and making sure it is every bit as good, as high in quality, as is possible.  I will shortly be ordering a proof and going through the text to make sure there are no typos or other glaring errors.  

I have come a long way since I first began this venture, and I am excited and happy to be almost through with this first novel, so that I can really start focusing on the next one. Well, focusing on writing the next one as I am marketing this one.  In case you haven't noticed, I am already busy at work, establishing the Gabe Gott, indie fiction / underground fiction, brand, and soon I am hoping to reach out to different  underground fiction websites and forums and introduce them to me, and hope for the best.

Thank you all for your patience and your support.  I know this whole thing is crazy, and it has taken me forever to get to this point, and I keep retreading the same territory, again, and again, but I am determined to move forward, and to leave it how it turns out this last time, for better or worse.  There will be two versions out, two versions to choose from, and I will apply what I have learned, what I will continue to learn, to my next project, which, over the years since I came up with the idea, it has really taken shape--all I need to do really is to sit down and write it.  

I am hoping that I can do write and edit it in a relatively short period of time, so that I can release it next year, because I also have third, fourth, and fifth novels in mind to write.  Once I get past this "Out in the Garage hurdle", I will be productive and give shape to all of my ideas, and get them out to the world.  This is only the beginning.

Catching the White Whale

Yesterday my wife and I bought tattoos for each other for our birthdays.  Mine was a few months ago, but we had to move and all that at the time so we didn't have any money.  The tattoo artist, Cynnamon at Kustom Culture in Talmadge, drew her rendition of Moby Dick for me, and, I must say, she did an amazing job!  I will definitely go back to her for future projects.  :-)

Moby Dick has significance for me on a few levels: first, I am a hug fan of Melville and have read and studied most of his books; I am also writing about Israel Potter: His Fifty Years of Solitude for my thesis.  Second, and probably more significantly, I have finally harpooned my white whale: I have finished this first novel, Out in the Garage, and I promised myself that if I finished it I would get a tattoo as a memento of the occasion.  I released the book for sale last week.

Anyways, my arm is still a little achy, and it's red still from the trauma of the tattooing process, but I am glad that I did it.  While I am only a DIY operation, it does mean a lot to me, and I hope that this tattoo helps me mentally switch gears and continue plowing ahead.  Before I know it, this will all be over, and I don't want to have any regrets.  As the Flea sings in the Red Hot Chili Peppers song, "Deep Kick", "But the Butthole Surfers said, 'it's better to regret something you did do, than something you didn't do.'"  I agree with both him and Gibby Haynes.  It is far better.

Back to School

I am nearly finished with my first syllabus.  There are a couple of things that I need to add that I will find out about tomorrow, and then I will be ready to email it to my supervisor and get it okay'd.  I actually have more control over it than I had expected I would, but I stuck pretty closely with what he gave us -- I just added a little flair of my own, including a Kurt Vonnegut quote.

 My goal as a composition instructor is to be tough but fair and to help them become better, more confident writers.  The direction of the class will really depend on how they are as writers and where they need help.  I have a lot of freedom as far as the day-to-day structure of the classes, and what kinds of things I can do to teach the students.  If possible, I want to find ways to teach them that are fun for both them and me.  I don't know if I will do in in the fall, but in the Spring I might have my class do blogs and post their homework on them, or something.  I can help them set them up in class and then they will have the choice whether they will publish them for the mass public or just the class.  I have a lot of ideas and I am getting some good direction right now, and I am also working on the reading and getting myself into the right frame of mind.

 I am not going to use any of my own writing as examples -- I don't have that much of an ego.  The text book is adequate, and, if I want them to read a short story, I will find one online.  I will talk about my writing though -- mostly my essay writing, but I will bring up my fiction when it is pertinent.  I haven't decided whether I am going to tell them that I am self-publishing my own books or not -- although I do feel like it gives me more credibility.  I don't think I will tell them about this website, though.  If they find out about it on their own, it doesn't matter.  It's not a secret.

I should, however, be building my name as a writer around the department.  I will introduce myself in class as a writer who avidly advocates for self-publishing, as I believe it is the wave of the future, and so long as the publishers aren't censoring what is being written, the writers can prove how hard they are willing to work and learn as they go, and sell their own books, which are written the way the writer wishes them to be written, and fuck everybody else.

Even though the Internet has grown a little douche-y in recent years, I still believe it is the best hope yet for keeping the punk / DIY ideal alive, and, really, stronger than ever.  We are like entrepreneurs who are willing to work hard and do what is necessary to stay true to ourselves, and fuck what the status quo says.

Okay, so maybe I won't go into it like that, but that is what I believe.  Maybe my audience will never be huge, but at least I don't have to become someone I'm not just to turn into a monster.  I would rather earn a living as a professor or a teacher or a librarian or whatever the Hell I can find a job doing.

As I grow older and my life progresses and I eventually have children who live to be old enough to understand that life is all about how you perceive it, or should be, anyways.  So long as some major totalitarian shit doesn't take place between now and then.  It should be about how you perceive and can use your perceptions create your reality.  It's really the same thing as visualizing and achieving. And success should therefore be measured by how well your are able to perceive and realize.  The more closely your reality matches up to your perceptions, the more successful you are in life, that is if you let it be a positive thing and not a negative one.

That's why I believe I am successful, even though I am not rich.  I have found a way to do what I enjoy doing for a living, and it is only temporary if I don't take it seriously enough.  There are opportunities for me if I continue to work hard and take my work seriously.  It will only be a matter of time before I will actually be able to earn a decent living.  I just have to keep my head done, my brain focused, and put my senses to work, on high efficiency.

Penguin Rangers Unite!

Watching http://youtu.be/uQWxtLUsRYM as I pour myself into something I have not really done in a long time: writing.  I have forgotten what this feels like, but the sensory memory is still there. Anyways, this is why I love my profession, I may never make a lot of money, but I would rather be able to do this as often as possible.

Looking forward to school starting: this is my last week at my summer job! *does back flip*

Right now I am just working on some ideas and feelings I have been having, in story form, scene by scene.  My goal is to be able to leave the final product as much as it is originally written as possible, and to just work on it when I have opportunities to do so.  As a writer, I have been stuck in a rut, working and working and working on the same thing over and over again, and only getting marginally further than where I have been for six years.

Sometimes I will almost ruin a project before I finally get exasperated and want to give up, which is what is happening to my first novel, and I don't want that to keep happening, I just want to continue moving forward and working on my craft and applying what I learn as I am writing, and just try to get better with each project.

I am forcing myself to stick to one version of Out in the Garage, make minimal changes to it, and put it out, because, quite frankly, I have enough other things to worry about, I want to move on and begin writing a new rough draft, more or less in a stream of consciousness style, which I think will be very therapeutic when I am deep in the trenches of school and teaching and writing my thesis. Still, I do want to feel like Out in the Garage is actually finished when I publish it, so I am holding myself to reasonably high standards.

And, actually, what I said earlier isn't entire true, either, the changes I am making -- adding better descriptions and changing the text to the present tense (for the most part) -- aren't exactly minimal, they just aren't very complicated changes, they are building on what is already there and making it better.  I am trying to just keep in mind all of the advice that I have gotten, but follow my gut instinct, which is usually how I am most successful as a writer.

That's how I feel justified in it, that, and I am going to do another proof no matter how many changes I make -- and I am going to still publish it on October 18, 2013, no matter what.  My   schedule is as such: finish the last rewrite by September 11, finish proofreading by October 11, and have a smooth release on the 18th.

I really, really hope the next book doesn't take six years.  I am shooting for one year, but it will probably, realistically, be more like two, with the whole school and getting a job or going to get my PhD. thing, not to mention my marriage and family and friends and what not.  Still, writing fiction and recording music / playing guitar are good releases when I am stressed out and  have the time, and everybody needs that.  I am assuming the thesis is going to be stressful, especially as it approaches April-May.

Anyways, enjoy some RHCP!  Josh Klinghoffer impresses me -- it makes me want to see them in concert again, eventually.

Always Moving Forward

Still working through my first proof of Out in the Garage.  I am taking my time with it, trying to get the language as close to perfect as possible.  I have made some definite improvements.  The hard part for me is to not do too much.  I think that balance comes from experience, something that I will know more about after I get this done.  After I go through it and make the changes to my manuscript, then I will order another proof and solely focus on eliminating typos.

This will take some time, especially as I am trying to focus more on getting prepared for school -- particularly the College Composition class that I am teaching.  Now I have the texts that I will be teaching from, I can thoroughly go through them. I want to be comfortable with the material, because I know it will take a little while for me to find my rhythm as a teacher.  The more prepared I am the better off I will be.  My goal is to educate and make it as interesting as I can, because the hardest part won't be the teaching, it will be combating the indifference of the students.

I am also trying to focus more on my thesis: do my research and write my prospectus.  While I won't get it all done by the semester starts, I want have a good start on it.  My goal is to have my prospectus done by the end of the first five weeks.  I will probably be doing a lot of writing over Christmas break, but I have two semesters, so I just need to pace myself and not procrastinate too much (more than I already have).

In general, I am going to start focusing more on school and my school work and my career than on my hobbies.  It is the only way I am going to accomplish my goals.  I don't want to keep working in wage slavery -- or, at least, if I am going to continue being poor I want to at least enjoy my job and not be as poor as I am now so that I can at least pay all of my bills, pay back my debt, and still have a little money left over.  I don't need to be rich or famous or anything like that, I just don't want to feel like I am struggling.  In short, I just want the simple life -- which is far more difficult to achieve than I ever imagined it could be.

Finally, I am going to re-release my short story collection, Tales from the Fringes. I have taken the time to learn how to put together a professional-looking e-book version, and I am going through and trying to eliminate typos.  I put it out so quickly that I didn't take enough time to do everything I need to do, and, as the publisher, and a perfectionist, I feel that the product I have for sale isn't as high quality as I am capable of.  Not that it is bad, or anything, I am just learning and am trying to hold myself to higher standards.  I am also going to release the e-book through Smashwords and many other websites where it is not currently available, including the iBookstore.  This will all be happening relatively soon.  I have reformatted it; now I just have find the typos.

PRICE DROP (what?)!

My short story collection is now only $6.99 (or cheaper on Amazon) for a paperback and $2.99 for an e-book (now available for Kindle and Nook).

GIVE AWAY

The first ten people to email me (gabegott@gmail.com) right now will receive a free advance PDF of my upcoming novel, Out in the Garage.  It will be as true to the final version, and you will easily be able to read it on an e-reader or a tablet or a computer screen.  If you ask me very nice, I might be willing to print you a paper copy on my high-volume laser printer.  ;-)

I have the free version on my Kindle and I really like the way it looks.

NOTE: If I get ten people really quickly, I will probably give away more.

Novel Two: Born in 1984

Officially beginning work on my second novel, Born in 1984, which is a full force plunge into social satire. I am pulling out all the stops and allowing myself to indulge creatively and say everything I need to say. My goal is to make a statement.

This is going to be a huge leap for me creatively, and I feel confident it's what I need to write right now. I have learned a great deal and I feel I am ready. I am at a stage where I have more or less finished what I have been working on and it is time to stretch my creative muscles.

I will also be writing some new short stories; I have ideas for at least three. I also have two I have written and am polishing to get published and one going to be published next year.

Still working on ways to promote myself, sell my collection, and build a fan-base. Also working on getting my first novel, Out in the Garage, ready for self-publishing.  I will be revealing the details for that, including the cover design.

Finally, I am gearing up to start doing the research for my thesis.  I am looking forward to it, actually.  It is a fun topic and I will be able to incorporate what I learn into my creative writing as well.  It's going to be a busy summer, but I wouldn't have it any other way.