Saturday, October 29, 2016

Rebirth: New Direction, or What I've Been Missing


One of the things that I have been thinking about the most lately is how I am going to continue to keep writing in my life, throughout my life. It's something I am fully committed to doing, and I have been looking for ways that I can maybe even make doing it the thing that I, well, do.

Then it hit me: it has been staring at me in the face the whole time. It is literally doing so now. That's right, I am talking about this blog. *cue inspirational music*

My inspirational music, by the way, happens to be Donovan's Greatest Hits on vinyl (which I bought here in Akron, at Time Traveler), what is yours? [Feel free to comment below. Also, for the record, I don't try to be a hipster, it just happens naturally.]


By Source, Fair use,
https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=3309711.

Anyways, since I have gotten back into writing a new post almost every Saturday, I am feeling pretty good about what I have accomplished so far, and I am looking to build on that. This website I have steadily, with relatively few gaps, been putting my time and effort into for several years now, and it's time that I take it to the next level, so to speak.

To put it plainly, I have invested time and money into building it into what it is today, and I have no reason not to use the resources I have available, with maybe a small budget for advertising on Facebook, to really reach out and start building even more of an audience. I appreciate everyone who reads it now, I just want to multiple you without having to learn genetics.

So I will be writing more about my life, which people seem to like, as well as things going on in my community, and things happening culturally, and about music. I don't know what kind of blog you would consider it, but I have always maintained that it is it's own type of thing, and I wouldn't really adhere to a set of specifications, I would just write about what struck me at the spur of the moment and go with it.

I guess all things change, but like all good changes, this change came naturally by way of me changing--it happens to the best of us. I am in the process of setting a schedule and figuring out advertising and promotion, and the whole bit, so it will take some work on my part. Mainly, other than planning, I will sometimes have to do stuff during the week to prepare for the blogs, so I can't just sit on my ass in front of the TV anymore, but it will be worth the effort.


It's like that Talking Heads song [see above] about Bob and Judy starting a TV show and saving their marriage, only with words and pictures, and stuff, on a digital canvas and me, not so much saving my marriage, since that is fine, but doing something with my life worthwhile for me to do. Hopefully, others, or more others, rather, find it to be worthwhile, as well--there is only one way to find out.

See you on the other side!

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Motivation

A chorus of birds heralded the sun as it broke through the clouds, which dissipated before his eyes. He took in another deep breath and smiled, then started on his way, jumping over the puddles that had taken over the tree-lined path. He didn't know where he was going, but at the moment, he wasn't going to worry about it.—"The Wanderer," from my chapbook, The Ever-Present Moment






It's important, as a writer, to write what you have to write, and then put it out there and hope for the best, sharing being second only to actually sitting down and producing it out of your mind womb.

These blog posts, I guess, are a sort of instant gratification, in that regard. It's a smaller albeit no less significant wave.

As I work on this post, I am also preparing some fiction to send out. It is a never-ending quest, or really, seemingly without end, for the time being. When I finally find homes for this set of stories, I will hopefully have finished the four I am currently writing, and start the whole process over again.

It gets easier with every passing year. I hone my skills more, continue the pursuit of the craft, just letting the words pour out of me.

As I find new homes for my writing, I meet new communities and find my place among them, sharing my stories and branching out, rushing headlong into the future.

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Ramblin' Gamblin Man, or You Can't Keep This Elephant Caged

Today's ramblings are brought to you by Cage the Elephant's latest album, Tell Me I'm Pretty (not Bob Seger, sorry Bob). When I first saw these boys at Lollapalooza in 2009, I knew they had something great going. Two albums and an EP later, and they only continue to prove it.

Anyways, for those of you who are relatively new to reading my blog, I haven't written a post this rambling in a while. I apologize to those who are used to my more polished prose. Blame it on the cold medicine. To be honest, though, I am not really that sorry. This is more of a return to form for me, since I spent the first several years of this website's existence just rambling about whatever topic struck me at the moment, which is what I am feeling like doing today. If you don't like it, don't approve of it, I will give you a moment to find something else to do...

Alright, are we good? Everyone still here? I am counting heads, and I only seem to have lost a few, just as I thought. Most of you are pretty loyal, which I appreciate. Keep up the good work!

I think I have come to an answer regarding the dilemma that I outlined last Saturday about the novel that I have partially written (a first draft of). Namely, I am going to finish it. Huzzah! When it comes down to it, not finishing it is a cop out, and I know that it is good, I just needed to remind myself why I chose this particular story to tell in the first place. In short, I wanted to make an artistic statement, as well as make a social criticism, and the time is right for me to do it now. If I wait, I could miss my opportunity, and I don't want to do that.

Right about now you are probably thinking, "But Gabe, you have told us about this novel more than once, but you have not told us a goddamn thing about it!"

That's true, and I am at the moment wrestling with myself about whether I want to tell you about it or let it remain a secret. The part of me that wants to tell you just punch the part of me that doesn't in the face. However, the part of me that doesn't is pretty resilient and is in quick order going to retaliate--I will let you know how it goes. It could be a long fight.

Hold up a second! That's actually not true that I haven't told you anything about it. I have in fact alluded to what it's about, possibly more than once. Without combing through several blogs, I remember specially telling you at some point over the past year or so that it takes place in Chicago in 2009 during the Great Recession.

Take that, bitch!

Okay, so I see that some of you who were expecting me to ramble are starting to lose interest. I built it up but then started talking about my book, and, with the exception of these talks about my rambling, and the intro paragraph, it has been pretty focused on that. The problem is, I don't really know where to go from here. My mind is pretty focused on this topic right now.

I could talk about the election, but I am pretty burnt out on that, to be honest. I have followed politics pretty closely for all of my adult life, and I was even the precocious middle school journalist who, while not taking it too seriously, followed politics at that time. Hell, I even attended a Bob Dole rally with my 8th grade newspaper staff, which basically meant standing in line for a really long time outside of Ashland University, which I spent most of entertaining (or annoying) those around me with my Ross Perot impression, which I basically stole from Dana Carvey: "Would you please just let me finish, Larry..."

What's going on this time around, though, what a shit show. Seriously. Just a real big fucking steaming pile of shit. And, if you thought it was going to end on Election Day, just wait. The candidate who I dare not speak his name is probably going to draw this out for a while, that motherfucker.

It's not like I am particularly excited about the other candidate, either. It's like choosing which rabid animal I want to rip my face off. What a fucking time to be alive! No matter what happens, I am still probably going to be poor and just smart enough to know that I don't have to be poor, but just dumb enough to lack the means of actually pulling myself out of poverty.

This election has made me feel almost completely disenfranchised. While I technically have the right to vote, and will still exercise it, I kind of want to give it back and go vote somewhere else. I hear Northern Europe is nice this time of year. I don't know Swedish, but I could learn. I mean, I have followed Ikea instructions, so how hard could it be, and Finland's education system has it's appeals...

That brings up a question, though: does a legal entity have to take away your right to vote (or prevent it) in order to disenfranchise you, or can they do it merely by setting a system that is so convoluted, that it doesn't actually matter how you vote?

Certainly there is a big difference in the candidates' polices (or lack thereof), so I am not suggesting there wouldn't be differences between a presidency of one or the other, but what I am suggesting is it doesn't matter whichever one gets elected, because there won't be much either one will actually do or change to make a significant impact on my life, realistically. I mean, look at all of the stuff President Obama tried to do for the greater good, that only turned out to be half measures or symbolic gestures, at best.

I am not suggesting he didn't ultimately make a difference in some peoples lives--although, to be honest, the biggest of those changes happened through the court system--but things he actually did initiate, or attempt to initiate, like healthcare reform and immigration, are even bigger issues, now, than they were before him. And it's not like he didn't try to make a difference, but when the system is set up to largely benefit those who already have everything, then it is their policies that are going to hold, in the end, rather than ones that are intended to make the system more fair for everyone. Oligarchy, anyone?

The only way any changes will happen that will have a lasting impact is through actually changing the constitution and leveling the playing field, and that doesn't seem likely to happen anytime soon. I feel like it would be healthy for our country if the states decided to hold constitutional conventions and passed a measure that would make a real difference, but are we even capable of that, as a country,  as a people?

Seriously, though, Northern Europe, I can handle your winters if you can handle my American loutishness. Once I chill out and calm the fuck down, it should go away in a relatively short order. We can make it work. Think on it...

Okay, so maybe my ramblings are more focused now, but I guess that could be a sign of my overall growth as a writer, rather than as a weakness. I don't want to end this on a political rant, though, but I do want to go to Taco Bell, so I need to decide on something more satisfying pretty quickly.

I guess I could bring it around full circle. Doesn't that sound nice? I think so. I think that's what I am going to go with.

This Cage the Elephant album is pretty fucking great. I have listened to it twice now while writing this, and I can honestly say that I might listen to it again. "Mess Around" is catchy as hell, as well as "Trouble," but really it's just a solid fucking album all the way through. If you like rock n' roll, it's fucking worth the ten bucks. Seriously.

I did this with Melophobia, too. That album blew me away. That transition in "Spiderhead" is fucking phenomenal, and "Cigarette Daydreams" gets stuck in your head, in a good way. Hell, maybe I will listen to Melophobia instead, now that I think about it.

There, that should get the bad taste out of your mouth from the discussion which I shall not mention the topic of that came just prior.

Speaking of tastes, Taco Bell beckons. I guess I should probably take a shower, too. 'Toodles!

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Driving Myself Crazy

Courtesy of Pixabay.
To write, or not to write, that is the question. Specifically, I am referring to what is currently my second novel. I suppose every writer goes through this every now and again, but I never really had this much doubt at any point about my first one.

When I started writing the first one, Escapes/Out in the Garage, I had no idea what I was doing, and that shows in the final version (and the fact that I published three editions within a year of it being first published). Even though I worked hard to make it better as I learned, there are some things that you just can't overcome, and sometimes that means you just have to give up on a manuscript. For better or worse, I didn't do that the first time around, and while I am proud that I completed it and put it out to the world, I know that it isn't perfect and never can be, no matter how much work I put into it or how many changes I make. I have reached a point that I am content with it, and how it is now is just how it is going to remain.

That being said, this current novel doesn't have any of those problems. I can say honestly, it is far and above better than that first one. For one, I have spent the last several years working to improve my writing and learning everything I can about literature, and I have a good understanding of the process and what it takes to complete a manuscript and get to a final draft I can stand behind. While I am sure I will continue learning and continue growing, and that someday I will look back on what I am writing now and will be able to assess it as I am doing now with what I have written previously, the writing I am currently producing is pretty good. I am finally really honing in on my style and figuring out what stories I want to tell.

The problem with this second novel, then, is less of a problem and more of an excuse. In short, it is literary fiction, set in something relatively close to the real world. There are elements of surrealism throughout, particularly through the second half, and as with most of my writing, it has a bit of a postmodern leaning, as well, which is subtle but still exists. That might just be the postmodern times in which we live, though. Anyways, the reason why I want to discontinue writing it, in spite of having already written 25-30k words, is that I am going in more of a science fiction direction.

While it is relevant both to my life and the world today, it doesn't as accurately reflect my style and the direction I want to go. Of course, I could make it more weird and up the surrealism another few notches, but around the time I seriously started working on it, I also developed another novel idea more in the vein of what I am looking to write. At the time, I wanted to "take my writing more seriously" so I decided to focus on writing the more serious work first.

Since then, however, I have had a number of flash fiction stories published, and they are all in more of the science fiction/postmodern direction I want to go, which makes me want to either go back to that other idea or start something new entirely (which I have also sort of, technically, done). Additionally, the next flash fiction chapbook I am releasing (sometime early next year) is definitely solidly in this new direction. While it's not really that new (see "The Bananamen Prophecy" from my short story collection, Tales from the Fringes), it is the direction I want to go because it is more my style, more what people want to read, and more fun to write (and read).

When it really comes down to it, the only reason that I am thinking about finishing this, what could be my second novel, is that I have already written a significant portion of the first draft, and it is actually much better than my first novel. If I do finish it, it will be the last of this sort of writing that I do for a while, maybe ever. If I don't, I could always come back to it someday, when I am feeling stuck creatively, and I want to change directions (if that ever happens).

Of course, this could just be me making excuses. I could just be dragging my feet, and I really just need to finish it and not worry so much about these things. My career as a writer is what I make of it, and maybe this isn't where I want to go, as a writer, it is where I am currently, so perhaps I should not get ahead of myself? Perhaps I should just stop thinking about it and start doing something, anything... These things, no matter which one I do first, aren't going to write themselves.