Now that I truly have free time, no classwork, no papers, no lesson planning, no grading, if I truly want to be a writer, and make a living doing it--because, let's be honest, isn't that the goal--then I should probably take the advice that my friend, who works in the industry, gave me--especially since her opinion has been reinforced. What's more significant is not that I have work to do to get it to a place where it is publishable, it is the fact that I do have something to work with, that is potentially publishable.
I just need to overcome my stubbornness and get over myself and do what I need to do in order to get it to the place where it needs to be. While it might take more of an overhaul than I have previously been willing to give it, if there are bigger possibilities on the other side of that then it is worth it to try. There is nothing definite, and it might not, in the end, work, but it has more a possibility of leading towards success than any other avenue that I can pursue right now as a writer.
At least I am nearly finished with grad school, where I will have the actual time to pursue it--even if I have to get a full time job. I would rather work 40 hours a week some place and be able to come home and do whatever I want with my time than continue being a student where I have no free time. I have my own studying to do, my own work to do, my own goals to pursue. I find that it is easier working full time being a part time writer than going to school full time and being a part time writer.
That means I have to find a job. That is the tricky part, actually. On one hand, I will have a master's degree, on the other, I am in Ohio. It could be worse, I suppose. Ten years ago, I worked, and struggled, and had no degree, and no hope for the future, and now, my life is completely different. That's something at least. While I might not be as successful as I would like to be right now, the fact that I have progressed gives me hope.
One difference between successful people and unsuccessful people, besides luck, and connections, is persistence. If I have an avenue towards success, even though it will take hard work, it is the way I must go. I can either be stubborn and accept obscurity or I can follow that little glimmer of hope and see where it takes me. Time to stop being stubborn and self-righteous.
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