Sunday, March 22, 2015

Take It In

My wife has already been up for two hours when I get up up at 9:47 and walk down the stairs. She is watching HGTV, which has become our latest addiction, as we dream of one day buying a house and remodeling it. The dream is still on the horizon, and we keep chasing it down, hour by hour, day by day, year by year, until, one day...

But for now we settle for the dream, still deep within the romance of the  idea, as realistic as we are trying to be about it.

She goes off and does her thing; I get my coffee, and then get an urge and change the station. It's time. Reporters and politicians are screaming across tables at one another in elegant voices, lost in linguistic sword fighting. These are the people who perpetuate the status quo through their inability to come to any terms--but the people aren't that divided. We are just meek, or so we think.

She is kissing me on the cheek as I am lost, trapped in a cave, staring at the shadows. Then she is pulling out the driveway, and I realize a few minutes later that I am by myself. 

Then it is over, and I get this urgent need to be productive so I clean. The dishes. The counters. The floors. The cat boxes... Before long the windows are letting in the insecure sunlight, and everything is glowing as the scene of my neighborhood fills my windows as I sit at my desk in my office, and I wonder how many around me have also won their Sundays. In this neighborhood, probably more than a few.

I realize that I don't stop enough and appreciate  my accomplishments, I am too caught up in the chase for more. I was swept away in the whirlwind and I have gotten too busy to notice that I am all of the sudden in technicolor. I need to catch my breath and slow the beating of my heart and stop the rush. I become awash in the softness of the daylight, and just take it all in... I let my breath out and become awaken to a  new state of mind... Seizing the day, I pull out my guitar.

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